This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Every concussion has its silver lining
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
