Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize
