you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
