I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
