Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Randomize
