i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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