too bad you live with your parents still
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
i think my cat just said my name.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Randomize
