Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize