DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Four minutes until I can fart!
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Randomize
