My nipple is on Facebook.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
