I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
