I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
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