we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
