i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
