Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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