ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize
