what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
