I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Randomize
