i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
