sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
