i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize