wrigley field is MILF paradise
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Randomize