That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize
