I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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