Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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