he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Randomize