Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
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HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
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I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
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