apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
