i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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