Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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