Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Randomize
