420 ftw
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
