their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Randomize
