worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
