My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Randomize
