Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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