Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Randomize