I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
