You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
false alarm. still invincible.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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