was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
false alarm. still invincible.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Randomize
