I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize