It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Drake has all the answers
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
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