I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
