Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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