school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
