If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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