I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Im part way to drunk.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
