Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
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