A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
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