We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
