I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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