The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
